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How can I help my cat be more affectionate?

Does your cat walk away when you pet him? Are you concerned that your new cat isn't very affectionate? Do you catch yourself thinking My cat doesn't like me?

It doesn't have to be that way.

Many people say cat's aren't neighborly creatures. In fact, most cats are warm, loving animals who want to show affection. But like any other relationship, the one with our cat can hit some rough spots. The big question when that happens is—how can I help my cat be more affectionate?


Get your cat active before you try to snuggle.

Jackson Galaxy says, "Proactivity is key, folks. You gotta play with your cat." He's right. Give your cat access totoys, gadgets, and games to engage his mind and exercise his body. A standard red laser pointer, aneco-friendly toy, or acat-friendly app can help your cat relax.

For downtime, don't leave your cat to find his own activities. Instead, providea window-seat bed where your cat can watch the birds at the feeder or observe the world passing by. All that healthy stimulation will tire him out, making snuggling on your lap seem more appealing.

Hold and pet your cat correctly.

If it seems like your cat hates being held, she does. No matter what treat you may be offering, a cat who doesn't want to be in your arms will find a way to get free. To get a cat to like you, make sure you are picking up, holding, and petting the animal correctly.

Training consultant Mikkel Becker says the more points of your cat's body that touch yours, the more secure your cat feels. How do you make your cat secure? You can start by picking up the animal onlywhen she wants to be picked up. Is she purring, rubbing against your legs, or chatting? That's a good sign she's ready to socialize. Crouch down, place your hand under your cat's rib cage, and use your other hand to support her hind legs. Pull the cat against your chest. Let your cat find the position most comfortable for her.

When petting your cat, make sure not to overdo it. That full-body stroke that most dogs love can overstimulate a cat. Instead, try holding your finger out for the cat to rub against you. Letting a cat come to you is the surest, safest way to gain a cat's affection and help a skittish cat feel more comfortable.

Keep up with the basics.

Does your cat have high-quality food? Plenty of fresh water? Access to aclean litterboxrecently filled with fresh litter? Something challenging to do? The occasional healthy treat? These things can help turn a huffy cat into a relaxed one willing to cuddle up at night or for a quick session on your lap.

Many cats grow more affectionate with age.

Living with a senior cat can be rewarding since they take to cuddling and snuggling with pleasure during their golden years. With these guys, you definitely want to watch out for their comfort, keep up with their meds, and give them plenty of food and water.

Many new cat parents askHow can I get my cat to like me?In most cases,our cats already love us. We need to learn how to receive it in a cat-friendly way.

Do you have a story about helping a cold or churlish cat find his warmhearted nature? Email us back, and share!